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Alcoholism

FullAuto ( 1,042 ) · Group: Administrators · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 12:08 AM

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Why, when drunk, does it seem like a good, nay, great idea to have another drink? All but unthinkable not to, in fact.

There's that little voice (probably what remains of your self-respect after buying and eating that kebab) going "Jesus, I'm so pissed!" and the rest of you is that glass-eyed staggering buffoon, trying to pay lip service to balance and equilibrium and common sense.

Or perhaps it's just me?

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cyke ( 208 ) · Group: Administrators · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 01:12 AM

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I'll have to take your word for it mate. From an early age I just didn't "get" the whole booze fad and after a few tipples something in my brain would go "STOP" and i would stop drinking. Must be a self-control freak.

At the age of 28 I have been drunk ZERO times, and threw up due to drink maybe a half dozen times.

Truth be told I dont feel like I am missing out on much though, I must have saved a fortune, which explains the Porsche parked on my driveway...

"A good plan, violently executed now, is better than a perfect plan next week." - George S. Patton

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silvertongedevil ( 333 ) · Group: Contributors · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 10:44 AM

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I reckon there's a very fast being that moves so quickly that it can't be seen. It's whole life cycle is committed to force feeding booze to unsuspecting drinkers as they speak.

I don't understand why the time goes so fast when you're in the pub.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

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Pete ( 700 ) · Group: Administrators · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 11:30 AM

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The most drunk I've ever been recently is at a Christmas party that was 50 a head in advance for meal, disco and free bar all night. That's one of the few times I've forgotten what was going on when I woke up the day after the night before.

The problem was only partially that it was a free bar. It was mostly that I couldn't work out which bottle of red wine was mine, that it tasted like grapefruit juice and that I thought someone else was drinking the red with me.

Apparently with all of these factors put together, and the array of bottles on the table confusing me, I drank 3 whole bottles. I though I'd only had two, but several eye witnesses confirmed three...

...and I usually get fairly merry off two glasses.

Good night though!

And yes, I realise tha because I am normally a lightweight that I don't haveto drink hardly anything to get tipsy, but I got confused alright? I might dig out the picture of "Pete the alcoholic" if I can find it where I'm sitting behind four bottles of wine with a glass in hand smiling maniacally

Aren't the Asgard supposedly technologically superior?

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silvertongedevil ( 333 ) · Group: Contributors · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 04:35 PM

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Mmmm, last time I got wrecked was so bad I can't remember when it was. I used to judge how good a night I had by the number of people who wouldn't speak to me the next day.

I've got a poem about being drunk somewhere, I'll try to find it.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

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Pete ( 700 ) · Group: Administrators · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 04:40 PM

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Written whilst drunk I hope?

Aren't the Asgard supposedly technologically superior?

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silvertongedevil ( 333 ) · Group: Contributors · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 04:42 PM

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The morning after, if I write when drunk it makes sence when sober.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

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FullAuto ( 1,042 ) · Group: Administrators · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 04:51 PM

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I plan to write some articles when drunk.

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silvertongedevil ( 333 ) · Group: Contributors · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 05:02 PM

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Make damn sure you use a pen, a large waste of time can reult otherwise.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

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silvertongedevil ( 333 ) · Group: Contributors · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 06:22 PM

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Found it. It kinda brought the feeling back after reading it. I tried to remember how it felt and then put it down on paper a few days after.

DRUNK 1st Feb 2000. Completely sober.

I can't focus, I think I must be drunk, the light, the door, that woman,
They are all blurred, I need a drink to clear my head,
Books on shelves, beer mats, bottles, empty glasses,
Some full, most dead.
Lots at the bar now, moving, spinning a little,
People are ugly aren't they? Just look at that man.
And that woman there, but that one is pretty.
I bet she saw me looking, smile the best I can.
Poster, mirror, lampshade, glass,
My glass, nearly empty I better fetch another.
Oh it's not my turn. "Who's turn is it?"
Well someone's gone, they talk too much.
I don't listen, I think I'm drunk.
Bottle, glass, coat stand, lampshade.
Here comes my beer, I can see my reflection in the glass.
It makes me look as if I've got red eyes.
Tables, girl with short skirt. She nice, no dress sense.
Who's prodding me? they want me to answer, they talk too much.
I don't know what they asked so I'll say something clever.
"In these situations............. I will tell you what I always say.
I tend.......... I tend to don't put my fingers ... in the mains socket...."
There that'll fix them.
Oh they seem to think I'm drunk, I can tell the way they talk away from me.
I suppose they've never been drunk, I suppose they think... Poster.
Glass, beer mat ripped up.
"Why do people do that?" Oh I think I said that when I should have thought it. I bet they think I'm drunk now.
Look at that man at the bar, that has to be the loudest shirt in the world.
I think I will have to tell him.
Yes, right, I'll go tell him, I'm up, ... I'm down.
"Leave me. I can get up, I'm not drunk I just felt a little dizzy."
I bet they think I'm drunk, I'll sit back down.
Glass, beer, ........table.
I think I am drunk, I can tell because I can think faster than I can talk. Not the case with the others at this table. Especially that Mike. I've always wanted a reason to punch him, the fat useless bastard. Yes I'm going to punch him, ....... I better do it sitting down though.
Oh hell I'm on the floor again.
"Leave me Mike, don't you touch me you santimominious ...."
Oh god even I know my speech has gone. I bet they think I'm drunk.
"Oh Mike, Mike... what's up with mee... Help me Mike, your my best mate I trust you..."
Oh did I really say that, I'll be crying like a baby soon.
Mike has helped me up, oh right we are going to the toilet, that's good.
Good old Mike he knows what to do, he's been drunk a time or two.
Look at them all looking at me.
"I'm not drunk, I stepped on a land mine in the Gulf War, ........... blew my balls clean off."
Mike told me to shut my gob.
She's nice by the toilet door. Quick smile, wow she smiled back, she must like a drun... war veteran.
We're in the toilet now, Mike farted, dirty git.
"You'll have to get it out Mike, I can't do it in my state."
There's no need to be like that, no sense of humour that Mike, I bet he thinks I'm drunk.
A quick wee and I'll be fine.
Wall.... picture...... mirror.... Oh hell I look like someone's stolen my face and left a Picasso painting in it's place.
I can't get my willy back in.... oh well I'll leave it out, no sense in risking getting it caught in the zip.
Mike is helping me out through the door, he's a good chap.
I feel better now.
That nice girl is still there .. but the smile has gone.
She looking at my crotch the dirty tart......
Oh shit, I forgot, my willy's on view.
"You see madam, the Ayrabs got my balls but not my knob."
That was the quickest I've seen these chaps move.
Into the taxi before I knew they'd even booked it.
They're still talking though.......... but not to me.
I bet they think I'm drunk.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

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Pete ( 700 ) · Group: Administrators · Rank: spacer · Posted On: December 22, 2005 at 07:12 PM

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Fucking hilarious

Aren't the Asgard supposedly technologically superior?

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Ivory ( 241 ) · Group: Administrators · Rank: spacer · Posted On: March 28, 2006 at 08:58 AM

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i hate being ick-sick so i stop before i get to that point, it is SO NOT CLASSY! tho i tend to have a few drinks, get a little pissed then level out for the next 30 or so, before i take another step into oblivion my top tip is stick to one typ of drink for that tho, wine and vodka together is NOT a good idea.

ps-drinking alone is shitty. BEST is to drink with your bestest friend in teh world cos you know in the morning they wotn be mad at you lol

pps-women arent worse at binge drinkign than men! its just cos men drink that amount EVERY weekend!

we are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars

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silvertongedevil ( 333 ) · Group: Contributors · Rank: spacer · Posted On: March 28, 2006 at 09:46 PM

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Never, no never at weekends. I can't say I ever have. Oh .... sorry ....... I got mixed up - I thought you said water.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

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Lady_Castlemaine ( 170 ) · Group: Contributors · Rank: spacer · Posted On: March 30, 2006 at 11:47 AM

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My nightmare began two weeks ago when I woke up on my day off with the whole room spinning round - and I HADN'T HAD A DRINK!!!
Did I feel crap! the feeling took nearly two days to go away, now don't mind accepting the punishment when I've had a skin full but this was totally unfair. It'll teach me not to abstain on a Friday night!!!

"To play it safe is not to play at all."

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Ivory ( 241 ) · Group: Administrators · Rank: spacer · Posted On: March 30, 2006 at 07:17 PM

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i simply think that its only fair if i dont drink everynight that i can have my weekly allowence in one night on a saturday.....is that not the way it shoudl work?

we are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars

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