Why, when drunk, does it seem like a good, nay, great idea to have another drink? All but unthinkable not to, in fact.

There's that little voice (probably what remains of your self-respect after buying and eating that kebab) going "Jesus, I'm so pissed!" and the rest of you is that glass-eyed staggering buffoon, trying to pay lip service to balance and equilibrium and common sense.

Or perhaps it's just me?

I'll have to take your word for it mate. From an early age I just didn't "get" the whole booze fad and after a few tipples something in my brain would go "STOP" and i would stop drinking. Must be a self-control freak.

At the age of 28 I have been drunk ZERO times, and threw up due to drink maybe a half dozen times.

Truth be told I dont feel like I am missing out on much though, I must have saved a fortune, which explains the Porsche parked on my driveway...

I reckon there's a very fast being that moves so quickly that it can't be seen. It's whole life cycle is committed to force feeding booze to unsuspecting drinkers as they speak.

I don't understand why the time goes so fast when you're in the pub.

The most drunk I've ever been recently is at a Christmas party that was £50 a head in advance for meal, disco and free bar all night. That's one of the few times I've forgotten what was going on when I woke up the day after the night before.

The problem was only partially that it was a free bar. It was mostly that I couldn't work out which bottle of red wine was mine, that it tasted like grapefruit juice and that I thought someone else was drinking the red with me.

Apparently with all of these factors put together, and the array of bottles on the table confusing me, I drank 3 whole bottles. I though I'd only had two, but several eye witnesses confirmed three...

...and I usually get fairly merry off two glasses.

Good night though!

And yes, I realise tha because I am normally a lightweight that I don't haveto drink hardly anything to get tipsy, but I got confused alright? I might dig out the picture of "Pete the alcoholic" if I can find it where I'm sitting behind four bottles of wine with a glass in hand smiling maniacally

Mmmm, last time I got wrecked was so bad I can't remember when it was. I used to judge how good a night I had by the number of people who wouldn't speak to me the next day.

I've got a poem about being drunk somewhere, I'll try to find it.

Written whilst drunk I hope?

The morning after, if I write when drunk it makes sence when sober.

I plan to write some articles when drunk.

Make damn sure you use a pen, a large waste of time can reult otherwise.

Found it. It kinda brought the feeling back after reading it. I tried to remember how it felt and then put it down on paper a few days after.

DRUNK 1st Feb 2000. Completely sober.

I can't focus, I think I must be drunk, the light, the door, that woman,
They are all blurred, I need a drink to clear my head,
Books on shelves, beer mats, bottles, empty glasses,
Some full, most dead.
Lots at the bar now, moving, spinning a little,
People are ugly aren't they? Just look at that man.
And that woman there, but that one is pretty.
I bet she saw me looking, smile the best I can.
Poster, mirror, lampshade, glass,
My glass, nearly empty I better fetch another.
Oh it's not my turn. "Who's turn is it?"
Well someone's gone, they talk too much.
I don't listen, I think I'm drunk.
Bottle, glass, coat stand, lampshade.
Here comes my beer, I can see my reflection in the glass.
It makes me look as if I've got red eyes.
Tables, girl with short skirt. She nice, no dress sense.
Who's prodding me? they want me to answer, they talk too much.
I don't know what they asked so I'll say something clever.
"In these situations............. I will tell you what I always say.
I tend.......... I tend to don't put my fingers ... in the mains socket...."
There that'll fix them.
Oh they seem to think I'm drunk, I can tell the way they talk away from me.
I suppose they've never been drunk, I suppose they think... Poster.
Glass, beer mat ripped up.
"Why do people do that?" Oh I think I said that when I should have thought it. I bet they think I'm drunk now.
Look at that man at the bar, that has to be the loudest shirt in the world.
I think I will have to tell him.
Yes, right, I'll go tell him, I'm up, ... I'm down.
"Leave me. I can get up, I'm not drunk I just felt a little dizzy."
I bet they think I'm drunk, I'll sit back down.
Glass, beer, ........table.
I think I am drunk, I can tell because I can think faster than I can talk. Not the case with the others at this table. Especially that Mike. I've always wanted a reason to punch him, the fat useless bastard. Yes I'm going to punch him, ....... I better do it sitting down though.
Oh hell I'm on the floor again.
"Leave me Mike, don't you touch me you santimominious ...."
Oh god even I know my speech has gone. I bet they think I'm drunk.
"Oh Mike, Mike... what's up with mee... Help me Mike, your my best mate I trust you..."
Oh did I really say that, I'll be crying like a baby soon.
Mike has helped me up, oh right we are going to the toilet, that's good.
Good old Mike he knows what to do, he's been drunk a time or two.
Look at them all looking at me.
"I'm not drunk, I stepped on a land mine in the Gulf War, ........... blew my balls clean off."
Mike told me to shut my gob.
She's nice by the toilet door. Quick smile, wow she smiled back, she must like a drun... war veteran.
We're in the toilet now, Mike farted, dirty git.
"You'll have to get it out Mike, I can't do it in my state."
There's no need to be like that, no sense of humour that Mike, I bet he thinks I'm drunk.
A quick wee and I'll be fine.
Wall.... picture...... mirror.... Oh hell I look like someone's stolen my face and left a Picasso painting in it's place.
I can't get my willy back in.... oh well I'll leave it out, no sense in risking getting it caught in the zip.
Mike is helping me out through the door, he's a good chap.
I feel better now.
That nice girl is still there .. but the smile has gone.
She looking at my crotch the dirty tart......
Oh shit, I forgot, my willy's on view.
"You see madam, the Ayrabs got my balls but not my knob."
That was the quickest I've seen these chaps move.
Into the taxi before I knew they'd even booked it.
They're still talking though.......... but not to me.
I bet they think I'm drunk.

Fucking hilarious

i hate being ick-sick so i stop before i get to that point, it is SO NOT CLASSY! tho i tend to have a few drinks, get a little pissed then level out for the next 30 or so, before i take another step into oblivion my top tip is stick to one typ of drink for that tho, wine and vodka together is NOT a good idea.

ps-drinking alone is shitty. BEST is to drink with your bestest friend in teh world cos you know in the morning they wotn be mad at you lol

pps-women arent worse at binge drinkign than men! its just cos men drink that amount EVERY weekend!

Never, no never at weekends. I can't say I ever have. Oh .... sorry ....... I got mixed up - I thought you said water.

My nightmare began two weeks ago when I woke up on my day off with the whole room spinning round - and I HADN'T HAD A DRINK!!!
Did I feel crap! the feeling took nearly two days to go away, now don't mind accepting the punishment when I've had a skin full but this was totally unfair. It'll teach me not to abstain on a Friday night!!!

i simply think that its only fair if i dont drink everynight that i can have my weekly allowence in one night on a saturday.....is that not the way it shoudl work?

In most towns in Wales, if you plan on going out and having a few drinks, you should take plenty of friends with you. You will be grateful for the safety in numbers when the fighting starts.

I just don't understand why some people seem to think that a night out is incomplete unless they've kicked the crap out of someone who only said "Hi". Some of these people don't even bother with a real or imagined slight before resorting to fisticuffs.

You would have thought that it would be safe to go out drinking in my village on a Friday or Saturday night because all the clubbers are having fights down in Newport, which is presumably why they are called clubbers. However, we are plagued by 14 year old girls who are out to get drunk and seduce somebody. And the bar staff always pretend that they belived these children to be over 18 because that way, they can take money off them.

The only bar that is reasonably free of these children is prohibitively expensive because tourists tend to assume that an expensive bar and hotel must therefore be good quality.

i REALLY cant stand people who buy alcohol for random kids ho are hanging abotu out side the offlicense! the kids MUST BE UNDERAGE or they'd have broguht it themselves! DURGH! its just stupid, and ignorant if youask me (dotn worry im aware you didnt)

As for alcoholism....i really get pissed off with people who come to work hungover alot - and use it all day as an excuse to get out of doign the less nice jobs. that bugs me- they KNOW they have work/school the next day, so WHY get that pissed up! its not like they dont have any days off in a week, or in our case any holidays to get ratted in like the rest of us!

Well as long as it isn't your pupils who are irritating you by hanging around the off-license and asking you to buy booze for them and then turning up the next day hungover.

I'm not terribly symathetic when people complain about being hungover. After all, there is a miracle cure for hangovers, specifically not drinking as much the previous night.

Jesus AT, you should be a doctor - that actually worked. I'm cured!!!!

I'm going for a beer to celebrate.

ill drink to that!

As long as it's a pint of scotch, so will I.

If you accept a hangover the next day as part of being drunk and you're not going to be a burden on me, that's fine, but people who can't work out the connection between the cause and effect make me go and sharpen my axe...

peopel who know you have somethign important to do that day, and who turn up with a bottle of water and think its funny that they cant do anything when everyones result is tied into the groups level of performance PISSES ME OFF!